Unconditonally Love - Why Forgiveness Is Necessary For Your Body and Emotions

After you have had a traumatic experience, such as:to complete strangers and throwing your arms around
the onset of a major illness, the death of a child, thethem. I believe loving one another means forgiving the
loss of a job, the murder of a relative, the recuperationother person for their transgressions, whatever that
from a major accident or illness, etc., you may begin tomay be or however you perceive it. Is that easy? No!
question: Why are we alive?It is important? Absolutely!!
I began to ask those same questions, in 1980, after IWhy? When you hold any fear, anger, guilt,
had a job politically undermined. Rightly or wrongly, Iresentment, criticism, self-criticism, pride, arrogance,
was brought up to believe that if you did the right thinggreed, etc., it changes who you could potentially be.
and were honest with people, things would work out.Have you ever seen a Nerf Football? I have one that
What I found out was, my beliefs were wrong. Ifis yellow and blue. Let's say the yellow side is joy. Let's
people wanted to be negative, they could. Things diddefine the blue side as any negative emotions you are
not always work out.carrying around. So if you are carrying any fear, anger,
Yes, I made mistakes. I was not as assertive as Iguilt, resentment, criticism, self-criticism, pride, arrogance,
should have been when I realized things were goinggreed, etc., it diminishes your joy. Instead of the yellow
wrong. It took me months of assertiveness training,being 100% toward you, it becomes a fraction of who
therapy, and reading for me to feel as if I was not ayou are. When you are in a total negative emotional
failure. Along the way, I began to question: Why arestate, the side toward you is 100% blue. You, in
we alive? What are we here for?essence, loose the joyous person you could potentially
One of the first articles I read was in the Sundaybe.
supplement magazine of our local newspaper aboutWhat fraction of positive versus negative emotions
Bridie Murphy, a woman who had gone back to a pastare you?
life while hypnotized by her therapist for a this lifeThere is another reason you should learn to
problem. This spurred me read about past lives andunconditionally love yourself and others. Negativity is
then onto near death experiences, the soul lifting out ofheld in your body. Try this experiment. Take three
the body, going through a tunnel towards a beautifuldeep breaths and notice what is happening in your
Light at the end of the tunnel, and life review process.body when you close you eyes and think of the
I learned that the Light, which many have interpretedworse thing that has ever happened to you.
as God, was all loving. It did not judge the individual. ForDid you get tight shoulders, neck, or chest? Did you get
some reason, although I never had been told it, I hada pain in your stomach? Did you get stiff all over? Did
always visualized God sitting in a big chair with Tenyou get a headache? Traumatic stressful events
Commandment like tablets keeping score over myleave an emotional pattern in your body.
rights and wrongs. "Today, you did 2 good things and 3After I had my job politically undermined, I read about
not so good things. Your behind in the goods for"clearing letters." You can write these letters to
today."whoever had caused you pain whether they are living
Instead, while the soul was experiencing its life review,or dead. You even can write one to yourself. You do
the Light was nonjudgmental. In essence, the Light didNOT mail them. Please do not do this on the computer.
not care! The soul was the one who watched theIt is not nearly as effective. Here's what you do. Find a
replay all the thoughts, words, or deeds of its life andtime when you can be alone in a quiet place, get a
how they affected others and their families. The soultablet, pen or pencil, and box of tissue. You begin
was the one that judged its life events. I found thatwriting: Dear Whoever, I am angry with you because...
rather freeing. At the same time, I came to realizationKeep writing until you can say at the end I forgive you.
that to me this is what "Judgment Day" is all about.I find that I begin writing on one line and pretty soon my
Just because God is nonjudgmental, you do not thenwords begin to be two or three lines big. Then they
get to do anything you want. Your soul still judges allget five or seven lines big. Not long afterwards, my
your words, thoughts, and deeds. To be honest, mywords become a single page and when I'm really
deeds or actions for the most part are pretty good. Iangry, a single word can be two pages. Sometimes
try to even be careful with my words. My thoughts, letthat can take quite a few pages.
me say, sometimes I'm not very proud of them.I was angry with the five vice-presidents and the
Therefore, knowing that this judging is something I willpresident for either undermining me or not supporting
have to do, I have tried to keep even my thoughtsme in my job. One day, while my family was out, I
loving.decided to do this clearing exercise. The five vice
Years later, I met a couple of people who told mepresidents took several pages and a lot of time. Last
about their near death experiences. They both say, thewas the deceased President. When I began writing his
hardest part of the entire experience is the life review .letter, I had not understood that I was more upset at
One gentleman told me that he actually had a secondthe president than the others. Soon I had a pain in my
near death experience and the first part of his life's lifeabdomen that was so severe, I knew I was going to
review was "still painful to watch." Although this washave to go to the hospital. I was determined to finish
important information, it did not completely explain:the president's letter before I left, so I continued writing.
"Why are we alive?"When I finished my letter and the releasing of my
Then in 1989, I attended the Chinese Exhibit inanger, I realized my pain was gone! I eliminated my
Columbus, Ohio. Before you walked into the exhibit,emotional and physical pain. It was but an emotional
they had a black wall with a timeline of China's history. Imemory stored in my body.
noticed that approximately every 1000 years a newYou see, forgiveness is not for them, those that "did it
religion came into being. It was a fact I stored in myto you." It is for you. You are the one holding your pain.
memory.You are the one paying a physical and emotional price
Years later, while I was shopping, I noticed on the wallfor any fear, anger, guilt, resentment, criticism,
a poster of "The Golden Rule" in seven differentself-criticism, pride, arrogance, greed, etc. You are the
religions: Buddhism, Brahmanism, Taoism, Christianity,one holding it in your body. You are preventing yourself
Judaism, and Islam. Now it all came together. I realizedfrom living a life of total joy.
that God has been trying to get the message to "DoIs it important that people know you forgive them? No.
unto others, as you would have them do unto you."In fact, a lot of people would be surprised that you
across to people for generations. Later, I learned thatwere angry with them at all. Since we all have feelings,
The Golden Rule is in all religions except two. To me,sometimes you can take things personally. Your anger
the most important part of The Golden Rule is the "domay be from some comment they made that was
unto you." Many people do not believe they arenot intentionally hurtful. Others might not know you
worthy of respect or love. Consequently, I believe Thewere hurt by their comments. How you treat others,
Golden Rule means to learn to love yourself, so youwill let them know you forgive them.
will love others.My conclusion to the questions: Why are we here?
Since life is all about emotion, loving one another is notWhat are we here to learn?
easy. Loving myself can even be difficult when I haveWe are here to work though our emotional issues by
made what I consider a mistake. I can ruminate overlearning to love ourselves and others unconditionally.
my mistake for quite awhile before I can move on. So,Make forgiveness an important part of your life. Learn
if it is important to love one another and ourselves,to unconditionally love yourself and others, so you can
how do we learn to do it?live a "Life of Joy.
I do not believe loving one another means, running up