| Have you ever thought about consciously seeking a | | | | resolve any kind of anguish, awakening to our true |
| meeting with the Grim Reaper? The classic texts of | | | | nature. |
| Buddhism claim that it is the first step to authentic | | | | Buddhism has always acknowledged that true |
| liberation. | | | | liberation can only come through personal awakening. |
| Most of us would rather avoid thinking about. However, | | | | Authentic freedom, say the Zen masters, can only be |
| thoughts about the inevitability of death can creep up | | | | realized through direct, personal experience. Treading |
| on us, worm their way into our brains, so to speak. Our | | | | the path of genuine practice and enlightenment can |
| notions of death (or 'after death') have a tendency to | | | | only be sustained by authentic aspiration. |
| arouse fear. Such concepts often consist of vague | | | | Meditation on death is one of the most powerful |
| notions of annihilation, of utterly ceasing to exist. | | | | methods of arousing authentic aspiration. |
| Thoughts of annihilation can certainly dull hopes and | | | | Meditating on the inevitability of death is not only has |
| undermine our ambitions. | | | | the potential to inspire genuine aspiration for |
| Nevertheless, taking an honest look at the Grim | | | | enlightenment, it gives us a more realistic perspective |
| Reaper has proven to be a most effective method | | | | on life, and can even provide a kind of yardstick to |
| for getting us on the right track to true freedom. | | | | measure our spiritual progress. |
| Zen Master Hakuin credited his awareness of death's | | | | Here is a standard technique for meditating on death |
| certainty with setting him on the path to enlightenment. | | | | (think of it as a kind of template to experiment with |
| Pondering the torments of hell as a child filled him with | | | | and personalize). We begin by settling into whatever |
| dread and aroused a determined search for liberation. | | | | our primary method of meditation is. Once settled, we |
| Zen Master Dogen's quest too, was inspired by a | | | | do our best to sustain judgements while we visualize |
| deep awareness of death while still in childhood. | | | | ourselves lying alone and nearing death. Breathing |
| Watching the rising smoke of incense at his mother's | | | | normally, we see the light go out of our eyes. Resting |
| funeral when he was only eight years old, he resolved | | | | here for awhile, we calmly observe our lifeless body. |
| to enter monastic life. As a teacher, Dogen often | | | | Next, we gradually visualize our body begin to |
| asserted that the knowledge of impermanence was | | | | decompose. We see its color fade to gray, then black |
| the beginning of practice. | | | | and yellow splotches slowly spread over it. We see |
| With a few notable exceptions, contemporary | | | | the skin begin swell and sag. We visualize the various |
| teachers have little to say about the hooded, | | | | fluids, watery or thick, black, green, and yellow leak |
| scythe-carrying monk. It seems that motivating | | | | from our own dead body and pooling around it or seep |
| students by arousing the ever-grinning face of death is | | | | into the ground. We watch as the insects and worms |
| out of vogue. Perhaps it is because of the reaper's | | | | begin to explore, nest, and hatch in our body. We allow |
| potential of scaring off donors. Some teachers, like | | | | ourselves to be aware of the stench of decay arising |
| funeral home owners, are sensitive to people's desire | | | | from our decomposing body. |
| for avoiding certain topics. | | | | If we become aware of agitation, we should rest here |
| While financial concerns may be a factor, there is | | | | for awhile and become aware of the thoughts and |
| more to it than that. Evidence suggests that some of | | | | feelings that are arising within us. |
| our teachers have not resolved the issue for | | | | When our observation becomes calm and objective, |
| themselves. For example, a "Zen book" by one popular | | | | we visualize our skeleton slowly emerging from the |
| teacher presents a story about a Zen master that | | | | softer tissue of our body. As the image of our own |
| was asked about the after death state. The "master" | | | | skeleton arises in the mind's eye, we allow ourselves |
| responded with, "Why ask me?" The questioner said, | | | | to become mindful our skeleton at this very moment. |
| "Because you are a Zen master." The master said, | | | | Our skeleton is at this very moment, imagining its own |
| "Yes, but I am not a dead Zen master." | | | | inevitable future. |
| Evidently, this is supposed to be a teaching on being in | | | | Now we watch as even our skeleton begins to fall |
| the moment. It is related as if the master is pointing out | | | | apart. We see our skeleton gradually transformed into |
| that questions about after death can only be resolved | | | | a pile, and then a scattering of bones. We continue to |
| after death. Initially, this sounds like standard Zen | | | | watch as the bones themselves become brittle and |
| wisdom. Looking a bit deeper however, that is unlikely. | | | | break into smaller pieces. Continuing to visualize this |
| Of course any Zen master worth his salt will insist that | | | | inevitable process, we keep going until we see even |
| we must each personally resolve this question--but | | | | our teeth turn to dust. |
| they would also insist that it be resolved while we are | | | | After we become comfortable looking deeply at our |
| alive. | | | | own death, we can follow a similar process for |
| We would not seriously ask a Zen master what | | | | meditating on the death of our loved ones. When we |
| happens after death unless we were is suffering from | | | | clearly see that everyone we love is going to die, our |
| anxiety about the Grim Reaper. Implying that "live" Zen | | | | thoughts, words, and deeds change. Our thoughts and |
| masters don't know, could easily be misunderstood as | | | | feelings about our loved ones become kinder and less |
| suggesting that the question can't be resolved, which | | | | judgmental. Our time together becomes more precious, |
| would be a subversion of Zen teaching. Saying, "I | | | | and our gratitude for them increases. |
| cannot resolve it for you" is much different than saying, | | | | We can also apply this meditation technique to those in |
| "I cannot resolve it because I am alive." | | | | our lives that we harbor resentment, or ill will toward. |
| One of the great Zen koans that illumines this issue is | | | | By becoming mindful of their deaths, we notice that |
| "Zengen's Living or Dead." The case goes: | | | | they too will lose everyone they love. We become |
| Once, at a funeral, a monk named Zengen tapped on | | | | aware of the people that love them, that will miss |
| the coffin and asked his teacher, Dogo, "Living or | | | | them and suffer because of their deaths. Gradually, |
| dead?" Dogo said, "Living, I won't say. Dead, I won't | | | | the anger, or vindictiveness we feel for the injuries or |
| say." Zengen said, "Why won't you say?" Dogo said, "I | | | | injustices they have caused dissipates. Often, this |
| won't say, I won't say." | | | | practice quickly fosters a sense of forgiveness |
| Later, as the two were walking home, Zengen said, | | | | toward them. |
| "Living or dead? If you will not tell me, I will hit you." | | | | As already mentioned, applying this technique can also |
| Dogo said, "You can hit me, but still I won't say." | | | | provide us with a kind of gauge for measuring our |
| Zengen hit him. | | | | progress on the path. Observing how the thoughts and |
| Later, after Dogo died, Zengen related this incident to | | | | emotions aroused by this method are gradually |
| Sekiso, another teacher. Sekiso said, "Living, I won't | | | | transformed over a period of time, we can evaluate |
| say. Dead, I won't say." Again Zengen asked, "Why | | | | the gap between our knowledge and our realization. |
| won't you say?" Sekiso said, "I won't say, I won't say." | | | | The quantity and quality of anxiety or doubt that arises |
| At these words, Zengen finally saw through the Grim | | | | during this process is directly proportionate to the gap |
| Reaper's costume. | | | | between our understanding and our realization. |
| Later, Zengen came into the teaching hall carrying a | | | | Cultivating a deep awareness of the certainty of our |
| hoe. He walked back and forth as if looking for | | | | death grants us a realistic appreciation for the |
| something. Sekiso asked, "What are you doing?" | | | | preciousness of a human life. Truly realizing the we will |
| Zengen said, "Looking for our late teachers relics (bits | | | | die alone, that nobody can walk through that gate for |
| of bone, etc. found after cremation)." Sekiso said, | | | | us, can inspire us to earnestly, and personally resolve |
| "Vast and limitless, the myriad thundering waves fill the | | | | the great matter of life and death. |
| sky. What relic do you seek?" Zengen said, "That is | | | | Being mindful of the ceaseless approach of our own |
| just where to apply effort." | | | | death puts things into proper perspective. Some of the |
| No doubt this koan does offer some intellectual | | | | things that seem valuable or important will dramatically |
| satisfaction on the question of death. Yet, that is not its | | | | lose their significance in the reflection from Death's |
| function. The classic Buddhist doctrine of "no-self" | | | | scythe. Things that previously seemed trifling, even |
| (hence no-death) is intellectually and philosophically | | | | worthless, take on a whole new light. The burning |
| presented in much clearer terms elsewhere in Buddhist | | | | desire for that new car or bigger house may suddenly |
| literature. Zen koans are not concerned with | | | | fade out. True joy and wonder for the "little things" |
| philosophical concepts. Obviously Zengen would have | | | | may surge up. The tree-fort we build with our child, the |
| been deeply familiar with the Buddhist doctrines on | | | | cup of coffee we share with our spouse, or the |
| no-self. He was a Buddhist monk after all. | | | | sudden realization that the sun rises in the East and |
| Koans offer practitioners a 'gap' through conceptual | | | | sets in the West may suddenly seem causes for |
| understanding to the reality beyond. It may be better to | | | | celebration. |
| say that koans bridge the gap between theory and | | | | Both Dogo and Sekiso said, "Living, I won't say. Dead, I |
| the truth that is beyond mere conceptualization. (This | | | | won't say." When asked by Zengen why, both said, "I |
| particular koan even offers something of a | | | | won't say, I won't say." |
| "self-reference" giving us a clue about "just where to | | | | It might seem that Zengen did not "get it" when Dogo |
| apply effort" (in our meditation). | | | | said it, and did "get it" when Sekiso said it; however, |
| Neither Dogo or Sekiso say, "I can't say" or "I don't | | | | that misses the point. The words of Dogo and Sekiso |
| know." They both say, "I won't say." Even if Dogo or | | | | are not different, what else about these two teachers |
| Sekiso gave him the "answer," it would not allow him | | | | is not different? |
| (or us) to see that the Grim Reaper's scythe is made | | | | After Zengen resolved the issue for himself, what did |
| of papier-mâché. (This is one reason why | | | | he mean saying he was looking for his late teacher's |
| books with koan "answers" don't offer any real insight | | | | relics? And why did Sekiso suggest that those relics |
| to students or pose a threat by "giving away" | | | | filled the earth and sky? |
| anything.) | | | | I won't say, I won't say. |
| Before resolving the issue, Zengen was so desperate | | | | Why won't you say? |
| for the "answer" that he was willing to apply physical | | | | Becoming intimate with our own true nature begins by |
| violence to his teacher. Then, upon his personal | | | | becoming intimate with the grinning face of death. If |
| resolution he was so confident that he had the | | | | we cannot look into his dark, eyeless sockets now, |
| audacity to enter the meditation hall with a hoe and | | | | how will we handle it when it is our turn to take a boat |
| respond to any challenge. | | | | ride with him? |
| What happened? What was the agent of such a | | | | If the Zen masters are right, when we truly see into |
| powerful transformation? One thing is sure, it was not | | | | the Grim Reaper's eye we will see the light shining |
| simply learning some new bit of knowledge. | | | | from the Buddha-eyes of all beings. A Buddhist |
| We, like Zengen, can easily grasp the Buddhist | | | | scripture says, "When I don't see, why don't you see |
| doctrines on the question. According to Buddhism, we | | | | my not-seeing? If you did see my not-seeing it would |
| have always been free from birth and death; our true | | | | not be real not-seeing. If it is real not-seeing it must not |
| nature is the source from which all things arise, abide, | | | | be an object, how could it not be you?" |
| and return-including the Grim Reaper himself. Yet, as | | | | Instead of turning to the TV, fantasy, ice cream, or |
| the Zen proverb goes, "Knowing about water does | | | | other distractions when the Grim Reaper comes |
| not slake our thirst, saying the word 'fire' does not burn | | | | a-haunting, why don't we try to discover the secret |
| our mouth." Buddhist teachings on emptiness, | | | | behind that ever-present grin. Calling him to sit |
| dependent origination, Buddha nature, and so on, are | | | | face-to-face with us for awhile we may come to |
| necessary guidelines for practice, but are of little use in | | | | realize that even death breathes. With practice, we will |
| and of themselves. | | | | learn to reach out, take hold of his dark hood, ease it |
| However, understanding that and realizing it directly are | | | | down and study his bony face. Examining the Grim |
| two vastly different things. When authentic Zen | | | | Reaper's form and emptiness, we are sure to |
| masters are asked about the fear and loss associated | | | | discover some familiar features. |
| with death, they point us to the only thing that can truly | | | | |