| In the past 14 years I've rubbed shoulders with more | | | | which we entered Bible College. I literally would have |
| ministers than I can remember. I've talked with ministers | | | | become a Pastor if they told me I'd never be paid a |
| of large churches, small churches, and every size in | | | | single penny. I was sold out. But adding a few waist |
| between. I've hung out with black ministers, Hispanic | | | | sizes has helped me recognize now what I didn't then: |
| ministers, Episcopal ministers, Republican ministers, and | | | | 18 year old kids suffer from what author Warren |
| yes, to my shame, even ministers who are Yankee | | | | Bennis calls "Delusional confidence." We didn't envision |
| fans. You name 'em, I've probably picked up their lunch | | | | the day when we would have a mortgage payment, a |
| tab. | | | | car with 182,000 miles on it, and one too many smiles |
| When our conversations move past square footage | | | | around the dinner table that need braces. Thank God |
| and per capita giving and other things that keep God | | | | for delusional confidence or we would have bolted to |
| up at night, we slowly let our guard down and begin to | | | | the local university mid-semester of our freshman |
| talk from the heart. Inevitably, that's when a well | | | | year. Nevertheless, and I'm ashamed to admit it, but |
| guarded secret is shared. For most ministers, it's a | | | | you'd be surprised how many pulpits would be empty |
| secret they've never shared with their colleagues, their | | | | if someone offered ministers a job similar or better in |
| churches, and sometimes even their spouses. I know I | | | | pay than their current assignment. |
| can count on one hand the people I've shared it with. | | | | Boredom |
| Until now. | | | | Finally, many a minister gets wanderlust because they |
| Regardless of how betrayed my fellow colleagues in | | | | have simply gotten tired of the "same ole, same ole." |
| the trenches might feel by me spilling the beans...I can't | | | | One minister confided in me that he thinks most of |
| hold it in any longer. I'm coming clean. | | | | those in ministerial ranks change things in their churches |
| Here it is: sometimes we wish we could quit. | | | | simply out of boredom. If most ministers are telling the |
| There, I said it. That felt pretty good. Ministers, say it | | | | truth, they'll admit there is more fact to that than they'd |
| with me, "Q-U-I-T. Adios. See ya. Hasta la vista. Outta | | | | like to admit. Now, before you start rolling up your |
| here." | | | | sleeves to throw stones, think about our typical week. |
| I think you get my drift. | | | | Go to office. People. Problems. Study. Lunch time. |
| You want to know what surprises me? Every time I | | | | More problems. More study. More people. Leave |
| hear someone tell me they're firing up a resume, I am | | | | office. Not exactly the job for second-career |
| always struck by how similar the reasons are for why | | | | NASCAR drivers. We ministers get into ruts. We get |
| they are taking their hand off the plow. | | | | bored. We lose energy. We read the church openings. |
| Difficult People | | | | On Mondays you'll find us on the mountaintop ready to |
| Many ministers say they're tempted to throw in the | | | | tackle the world, but by Friday at 4:45 p.m. we're |
| towel or move because of people. Problem people to | | | | cruising Too often, to our shame, spending time with |
| be exact. I remember the first church I served. After a | | | | our Creator becomes another "to do" item on |
| few months I was approached by a man who felt | | | | Microsoft Outlook. Ultimately, after a few years of |
| called by God to be my accountability partner...without | | | | hiking back and forth from the mountaintop to the |
| asking me. He offered to take me out to eat one day, | | | | valley and back, we ask ourselves, "Is this it? Am I |
| so I accepted. Little was I prepared for what was | | | | wasting my life doing this? Would a move to another |
| about to happen. Setting down his sandwich he said, | | | | church cure this restlessness?" That's not the kind of |
| "Brian, there are a number of things you are doing | | | | thing you want to hear out of the person leading the |
| wrong, but for the sake of time I've kept my list to 10." I | | | | charge, but more often than not it's the truth. |
| made the mistake of saying, "Start with number one." | | | | My Strategy For Pressing On |
| Two and a half hours later I left with two things--30% | | | | I'm not sure if this will help, but let me share a few |
| less self-esteem and a really good case for why first | | | | things that have helped me stay in the game so far. |
| cousins should never marry. | | | | First, realize that no matter how hard it gets, it's only |
| Like most ministers, I've regularly felt the sting of | | | | going to get harder. That may not be what you |
| difficult people. Looking back on some of these | | | | wanted to hear, but it's the truth. A mentor of mine |
| situations I've come to one conclusion: in every | | | | once told a gathering of ministers, "Happiness is to be |
| congregation there are always 3 or 4 blessed souls | | | | enjoyed like a sunny day." Meditate on that phrase...it |
| that are there because no other organization in town | | | | will serve you well in our vocation. Look up the number |
| will put up with them. Yes, I agree that it's hard to | | | | of times Paul used military phrases to describe our |
| overestimate the damage some ministers have done | | | | task. Re-read 2 Corinthians and envision how that |
| to churches. I own that. I know I've caused my share | | | | letter was written with hands broken multiple times |
| of pain. But it's also healthy to acknowledge that many | | | | preaching the same gospel we preach. Where in |
| of God's servants walk with a limp because no-one in | | | | scripture did Jesus promise us a balanced, contented, |
| their congregation had the guts to stand up to a | | | | pseudo-Buddhist journey? Take comfort in the fact |
| known troublemaker and protect their leader. It's at | | | | that Jesus expects you to be faithful to your calling but |
| those times it becomes easy to question whether the | | | | not derive all your joy and satisfaction from your |
| price is too high, at least for me. | | | | calling. |
| Those Highly Marketable Bible-College Degrees | | | | Second, make a vow. Almost a decade ago I picked |
| A while ago I stumbled upon one of those well-known | | | | up a book by a Presbyterian Minister named Eugene |
| job search web sites. Supposedly it is the largest in the | | | | Peterson called, Under The Predictable Plant: An |
| world...matching thousands of employers with | | | | Exploration In Vocational Holiness. The book literally |
| employees everyday. I was curious so I plugged in my | | | | saved my ministry. In it he described how in the sixth |
| education, experience, and the name of the mildly | | | | century monks were moving from monastery to |
| prestigious divinity school from which I graduated. Most | | | | monastery looking for deeper spiritual communities and |
| ministers will understand my elation at clicking the | | | | greater challenges. Things got too tough or |
| button and reading a report that pointed me to a long, | | | | shallow...they moved on. The problem of restlessness |
| distinguished career at my local Krispy Krème. | | | | became so widespread that St. Benedict added to the |
| When I've talked with colleagues, the feeling that is | | | | monastic vows of poverty, chastity, and obedience a |
| expressed is not necessarily one of resentment, but of | | | | fourth: the vow of stability. My hope is that every |
| being trapped. Even if they wanted to leave the | | | | minister who reads this, regardless of their situation, will |
| ministry, what kind of job could they get? Could they | | | | place themselves under St. Benedict's tutelage. |
| make what they're making now? Is it too late to start | | | | That's my story and I'm sticking with it. |
| over? Try to remember the vigor and vision with | | | | |